I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't d--
[There's a clunk as B runs into a wall and knocks himself out cold.]
Okay, uhm, the elevators aren't working on purpose so everyone stop asking me to fix them, okay? The Captain decided that you should all walk for a little while, so, uhm, just do that, okay? Isn't exercise fun? And you can be more social and run into each other on the stair cases more! It'll be fun! It's like a staircase-party! Yay!
[B can use the elevators, though, but he's choosing to trot from Deck 08 to Deck 03 with his toolbox in hand. Feel free to run into him on the staircases!]
[Locked to Crew // Unhackable]
Radiation's all cleaned up! It's safe to go near Liquid Metal Reactors 008 through 015 again!
Also? I found the gravity gun that everyone was talking about over dinner a week ago! It's so much fun!
Did you know that if you leave your lunch in an area with a lot of radiation and forget about it and come back to it like two weeks later it's still good?! It tasted a little funny, but I didn't get sick! Yay!
Also, I have a poem for you all!
[Baijznyherglert'allalax clears his throat.]
A is for ALANINE, three carbons long;
C is for CYSTEINE, with a sulfhydryl prong.
D is ASPARTATE, a good proton source,
And E, GLUTAMATE, is one also, of course.
F, PHENYLALANINE, has benzene on board;
GLYCINE, or G, wins the small-size award.
H is for HISTIDINE. What a great buffer!
And water prompts I, ISOLEUCINE, to suffer.
K: LYSINE's high on the pKa scale;
L is for LEUCINE, with its long Y-shaped tail.
M is METHIONINE, that sulfury lout,
And N is ASPARAGINE, an amide, no doubt.
P: PROLINE flaunts its odd ring like a bride;
Q, GLUTAMINE, is another amide.
R, ARGININE, has four nitrogens in all.
And S is for SERINE, a petite alcohol.
T is for THREONINE, similar to S;
V is for VALINE. Aliphatic? Why, yes!
W -- that's TRYPTOPHAN -- has rings at the end,
And Y, TYROSINE, is the kinases' friend.
Which brings us right back to the start of the song:
A is for ALANINE, three carbons long.
Okay! Anyone who doesn’t like to fight, doesn’t want to fight but still wants to get rid of the pirates, please meet me on Deck 07, starboard side, near the front of the boat! I have a very special job for everyone! Yay!
[B is waiting there with a whole stack of buckets, gloves, rubber boots, scrapers, pails, basins and face masks. He pulls down his mask when people start to arrive and waves his hands for their attention.]
Hey! Uhm, hi! I’m the mechanic on board and you can call me B, mechanic, you or hey you! As you can see we kinda have a problem with that pirate ship infecting the Elegante! I’m working on getting the ship’s immune system up and running, but until then it would be super if you could help! What you have to do is get down on your hands and knees, scrape up the slime and tissue and gross matter that grows in these tendrils and drump it in these buckets! We’ll run the buckets down to the Deck 11 fire and toss them in.
[He beams at everyone happily.]
Of course, if you do this you have lots of snacks, I’ll play some music while we work, and at the end you’ll get either a t-shirt or a baseball cap!
[B holds up the baseball cap and the t-shirt inscribed with the B’s Bucket Brigade logo.]
Put in as much or as little time as you can, but remember that every little bit helps! If you start to feel sick, then go see Doctorjamielapointe, and if you find some weird biological chunk in the goo, just let me know. Oh, right, before I forget—I need to clone a few more kilos of neural matter to make the immune system run properly! I have enough genetic material from the crew and dead pas—people to make it work, but the more genetic variation we have, the stronger it’ll be! I’ll just take a swab from your mouth, that’s all. Anyone who would be so kind as to volunteer, let me know.
Alright, team! Let’s get busy!
[Locked to Crew Only // Unhackable]
Okay, uhm, the immune system? Run into some snags. We don't have enough neural matter, even if we, uhm, slaughter the, uhm-- you know. Them. On the lower decks? I mean, even if we use them all, it's still not going to be enough, so there's really no point in doing that?
Uhm, anyways? I know we don't want to use anything radioactive if the immune system fails it won't fail, I won't let it don't worry Lily I'll keep you safe? But maybe we should start putting iodine and some pentetate calcium trisodium into the passengers' food? Just in case?
[There's a long pause as the mechanic drags the back of his wrist over his forehead.]
I'm trying not to panic. This is just really scary. Worse than lobsters.
Lily? I know I've been really busy but where've you been?
Also, there's a lot of new people! Hi! I'm the ship mechanic, so if anything breaks just tell me, okay? Yay!
Okay! Uhm! Everyone keep calm! Don't panic! I'm not panicking! I'm not! Someone just--
[He titters, an edge of hysteria in his voice as he jogs in circles.]
--turned on a very dangerous machine in my lab why would you do that oh GOD oh God oh God everyone keep calm it'll be okay! It'll be okay! Oh my God!
I just thought I should let everyone know that the doors to Carnival are locked for now! Okay!
[Locked to Crew // Unhackable]
Uhm, Firstmatekage said not to let anyone else in while he's in there. I'm just wondering how he's going to get his treatments while he's inside? If he doesn't get them, uh--
When is the new crew coming?